Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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