Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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