you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
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