Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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