Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
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