Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize