but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Duck Duck Cougar?
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize