I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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