im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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