he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm too high and old for this...
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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