8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
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she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
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Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
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