WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
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And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
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nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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