the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Randomize