I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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