you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
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I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
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For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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