quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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