He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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