Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
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What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
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You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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