She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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