You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize