She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize