Well apparently he's into motor boating.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
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He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
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He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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