Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
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I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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