Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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