Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize