i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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