FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Never joke about your clitoris.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize