My liver just broke up with me...
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize