4 words: hood of his car
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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