Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize