At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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