made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize