I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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