ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize