If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
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Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
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I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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