We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize