The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize