I need help removing her.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
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I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
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Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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