we're blogging at a bar
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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