i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
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i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
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We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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