remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
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