The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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