No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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