if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
babies were throwing up all over the place
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize