Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize