And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
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You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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