I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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