I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
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Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You have to summon your inner elephant
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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