only you would photoshop your dick
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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