nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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